A zoo close to Manchester was closed today after a boy was eaten by a gang of meerkats. The ten year-old was visiting the zoo with his family and is believed to have been playing the popular Pokémon Go game when the accident occurred.
DCI Barnaby Wankcoil of GMP said: “At ten o’clock this morning a nine year-old boy was playing a game on his mobile phone which caused him to enter the meerkat enclosure where he was subsequently eaten by the animals.”
Gary Helmet, who was visiting with his children, saw what happened: “I saw him climbing the fence and someone told him to stop. He shouted that he had to catch Pikachu and he wondered into the middle of the enclosure. The meerkats acted like piranhas; they went wild and ate him.”
“The TV adverts are lies,” says Dr Lexford Bumpoke, meerkat expert and trapper. “They are natural hunters. They are carnivores and have sublime predatory instincts. They think and act like sharks.”
…kidnapped and interrogated a homeless man for four hours…
The accident follows from another zoo in Wyoming, USA where a seven year-old girl reached through the bars of a peacock enclosure with her mobile phone to try and capture a Pokémon only to have her hand bitten off.
But what exactly is Pokémon Go?
“It’s an interactive game on your mobile phone,” explained Flo Spunkseed, of gaming magazine CtrlAltDelete. “The player uses real world locations to capture computer Pokémon’s to train and fight against others, kind of like computer slavery.”
This morning’s incident at the zoo has forced Manchester Council to publicly warn players of the game about the dangers. “We understand its popularity,” said spokeswoman Francesca Wildcunt. “What we need to do is make players young and old aware that taking it too seriously is posing a danger to yourselves and others around you.”
Pokémon Go has been blamed all over the world for accidents and even relationship breakups but it seems even adult players in Manchester are going too far. Three city centre insurance workers were arrested having kidnapped and interrogated a homeless man for four hours for the locations of three Pokémon’s; and a North Manchester Hospital surgeon was suspended after refusing to operate on a critically ill patient until she’d found a Pokémon located on hospital grounds.
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